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Should You Say Yes

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Should You Say Yes

If you have told family and friends "I want to get married," and "I know he's The One for me," then there are things you need to think about before you can be absolutely sure you want to spend your life with him.

Possibly, you have already considered all of these points.

It is also possible that you've discussed these issues, so you truly are ready to get married to HIM and there will be 'no surprises' later, such as a mate who is miserable living in the place you most want to be, or who has dreams and plans in life that clash with your own.

So here's a checklist of things to think carefully about, if you're trying to get him to propose and before you walk down the aisle (and if you want to avoid trouble after the honeymoon):

Getting Along Together

1. Are you happy with the amount of time you spend together?

2. Do you always enjoy being together?

3. Is time together increasing, or not?

4. Do you tend to disagree a lot? Are there fights?

5. Do you have a lot in common?

Shared Interests & Passions

1. What interests do you share? Are there hobbies, sports, or conversation topics you both enjoy?

2. Do you have friends in common? Do the friends - his and hers - get along?

3. Do you love his family? How does he feel about yours?

4. Are your core beliefs, and other types of beliefs (morals, ethics, religious, political) compatible?

5. Do you tend to enjoy the same books, movies, music, etc.?

6. Having children - are you together on that, both if and when?

Your Goals In Life - And Also His - Good Fit?

1. Are you at similar stages in life?

2. Do you want the same things, whether that is to quit jobs and travel, or focus on careers - buy a hobby farm or live on an island - start a business or work for a major corporation - and what if one of you longs for a choice, and the other loathes it? How will you compromise?

3. What about time - how much will be spent together, and how much apart?

4. What about money - how will you share it? Also, beware, a big spender married to a super saver are headed for trouble.

This isn't one of those magazine quizzes where you get to add up the score and find out "Are You Compatible For Each Other?" because it just isn't that simple.

When you think deeply about who you are and what you want - and he does the same, you can identify early where there may be problems. Or, possibly, see that perhaps you shouldn't be trying to get him to propose because this love isn't meant to lead to marriage - but the next one might be.


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